illusions. dreams. reverie. candy castles.

Friday, February 23, 2007

the letter 'l' has it all.

the letter 'l' has a way of complicating things.

life, for one, has already been complicated. the other three l-words that make life more and

more complicated are: loving, leaving, and letting go.

loving. it is

hard to love when you know from the start that there's some point in our lives that we have to

end it anyway. it is ahrd to love a friend whom you know will be taken away from you at the

end. it is hard to love a lover whom you know has no defined future with you. and most of all,

it is hard to love a point in our life that we know will end anytime fate forces it

to.

it is hard to love. but what makes it far harder is that it is the most

difficult to resist as one just feels the urge to burst out what one feels. and it is only

through love that anyone can feel content and completeness. as they say, it is easier to feel

a heartbreak than to feel nothing at all. pain makes you alive while the absence of pain is

just like dead and no longer dying.

leaving. it is a terrible heartache

to see a back being turned, knowing that it may take forever before it could face us again.

similarly, it is hard to turn your back to all the things that made you feel your presenc is

important, that made you feel alive and active, and that made you feel your essence as you and

not just any other individual. i don't know which is aching more-- a person leaving, realizing

that he or she has to go somewhere else without the people who would support his wings, or a

person left behind, dawning to him that he must fly although no one would support him and that

he is still far from the peak his fellows have reached.

letting go.

there are certain periods in life that we ahve to live in another world and learn to move away

from where we have used to be. there comes acceptance; acceptance that nothing in life is

permanent and that in order to progress, we have to move on and let go of the things we'd like

to keep. we own nothing in this world. what we have now will someday and somehow be taken away

from us. we will have to let go of the wonderful things and strive to find new ones. we have

to let go for as long as we keep on holding back, we can never be loved, left behind and let

go of newfound things. because technically, we've never allowed 'firsts' to start in our life.

posted by anthonette || 10:40 PM